Need a laugh? Of course you do. As our Morgan Little noted Thursday, the American Psychological Association is heading to Washington next week for it’s annual meeting.

That (of course) means it’s fodder for The Onion.

In a piece endearingly titled “Psychology Comes to Halt As Weary Researchers Say the Mind Cannot Possibly Study Itself,” a panel of frustrated APA members reveal during a news conference that they’ve decided the association—as well as the practice of psychology—cannot possibly continue due to a clear incompatibility of mission with reality.

“We’ve spent years trying to discern how the mind functions, but today I am forced to admit that this so-called research was nothing more than a fool’s errand—and that we people of learning were the greatest fools of all,” American Psychological Association President Nadine Kaslow was reported as saying by the parody news site.

The APA approves of the coverage, by the way:

Can APA take a joke from @TheOnion? Definitely. http://t.co/eX5gsC9rXe Psychologists have studied humor for decades http://t.co/fqiXYmrutZ

— American Psychological Association (@APA) July 31, 2014

Watch out, guys—if you’re not careful, The Onion might kill your association too one day.

Go Inbound

Four Sources for Inbound Membership Marketing http://t.co/58G6RycTfe

— Tony Rossell (@TonyRossell) July 31, 2014

Eventually, your direct marketing strategy might reach its limits—in other words, your prospects aren’t really biting anymore and you need to give ’em a break.

Tony Rossell, a senior vice president of Marketing General, Inc., suggests that your next step might be focusing on inbound marketing instead—relying on things like Facebook or search engine advertising to drive attention to your programs, products, and services.

“Inbound membership marketing helps you reach new prospects that you may not have interacted with before and allows them to raise their hand and come to you in search of the very information and products that you produce,” he explains.

Over at his Membership Marketing Blog, Rossell offers four strategies that could get you started. Who knows? You might find some prospects you weren’t even expecting.

Other good reads

The Wikimedia Foundation may struggle dealing with the whims of Wikipedia’s many users, but that hasn’t stopped the foundation from relaunching its iOS app.

Adobe Illustrator drive you batty? If you’re a Mac user, get a load of Affinity Designer, an inexpensive competitor that’s in beta.

Personal agendas can get in the way of getting the right speakers at your event, Velvet Chainsaw Consulting’s Jeff Hurt warns.

(photo by Mo Riza/Flickr)